We’re in the middle of a wonderful holiday with my French family, and the other night, Fred – my sister’s partner – said something that really stuck with me:
“Military-style holidays just aren’t for us.”
It was aimed at me, and honestly, it got me thinking.
In this video, I want to talk about something I’ve been reflecting on: finding the balance between flexibility and discipline.
Right now, we’re in Crete, Greece, with TK (my wife), our two daughters, and my French family. A few days ago, we were in the car with Aude (my sister) and TK. It was around 7, 7:15pm, and we suddenly realised we hadn’t planned dinner.
They started talking about going shopping, buying the ingredients, and cooking a BBQ all together. Straight away, my brain kicked into overdrive:
“Okay… it’s 7:15pm now. By the time we drive to the shops, it’ll be 7:30. Shopping will take at least half an hour, so we’re at 8pm. Then we drive back – 8:15. Cooking will take 45 minutes. There is no way we’re eating before 9pm.”
And I could feel myself getting stressed.
I have a routine of eating earlier so I can sleep well – and my stress started annoying everyone. Both Aude and TK had a go at me. They said, “Relax. We understand your point, but we’re on holiday, and you’re stressing everyone out.”
At that moment, I realised… I was completely failing to see the big picture.
I don’t have a perfect answer for this one – I actually failed miserably that night. But here’s what I took away:
Tough love is a gift.
I’m incredibly lucky to have people who love me enough to call me out when I’m missing the bigger picture. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s love.
Efficiency is not always effectiveness.
Efficiency is about timing, organisation, ticking things off the list.
Effectiveness is about achieving what really matters.
That evening, I was being “efficient” in my mind, but completely ineffective. The goal wasn’t an early dinner. It was quality time with the people I love.
Flexibility matters.
Routines are important. They keep us grounded and healthy.
But so is flexibility. Being able to let go, adapt, and embrace the moment – even if it means dinner at 9pm – is equally important.
In the end, we ate at 9pm. And you know what? We had a wonderful evening, filled with laughter, conversation, and memories. That’s when Fred said, “Military holidays are not for me” And he was right. Because these moments – sitting around a table, sharing a late dinner with family – they’re the moments that build lifelong memories.
So my question to you is this: If you imagine a scale between being too flexible (not disciplined enough) and being too disciplined (not flexible enough), where do you sit? And what helps you find the right balance?
This is this week’s Work Smarter: Live Better tip.
Hope you have a lovely day!
A bientôt,
Cyril
